By Brendan Ulmer
Ulmer Uninterrupted
Sometimes I have a difficult time coming up with topics for a column.
Most of my opinions are either banal or would make my duty of covering local issues more difficult. Furthermore, at 22 years old, my cupboard of stories (at least stories appropriate for a column) is rather bare.
I was on the phone with my mom Sunday night, and we talked about this very topic. Eventually, we started talking about my birthday, which is on Jan. 27, and whether I would rather have her and my family come down from Kansas City to visit on the weekend of the 24th or 31st.
“You know, I would be the happiest birthday boy in the world if you guys came for both weekends,” I said.
She then referenced a conversation we’ve had many times.
“Maybe you could write your column about why we should move to Hutchinson,” she said, joking.
Challenge accepted, my parents should move to Hutchinson.
My parents are a decade or so away from retirement (but they look great for their advanced age!), and in my opinion, Hutchinson is the perfect place for them to retire.
First of all, my parents’ dollar will stretch so much further here in Hutchinson than in some Johnson County suburb.
If my parents move to Hutchinson, they will be able to get out of the world of cramped cul-de-sacs and picket fences and settle on a nice, quiet piece of property north of town.
It’s not just the property values that are cheaper–gas is cheaper, even certain groceries and fast food places are cheaper.
My dad has always had a vision in his head of his family riding around a big, grassy, secluded property on four-wheelers. This is not a dream that the HOA would let my dad live out now, even if he had the space to do so. Dad, you deserve to live out this dream.
My mom is from here. She grew up north of Hutchinson in the Medora area, and her whole family still lives out there. Soon, I will be married to my lovely fiancée, and kids will hopefully be on the way not long after that. My mom is incredible grandma material. Think of it like this, when Lebron James was in high school, all the talk around him was that he would go on to be one of the best basketball players of all time, everyone just knew. That’s basically what my mom is to grandmothering. If she moves down to Hutch, she will basically have a blank check, unlimited access to see her grandkids at any reasonable time she wants.
My younger siblings are probably thinking something like, “Hey, we may want to have kids one day, why should mom live around your kids and not ours?” To them I say, first come, first served.
Now, I hope the takeaway from this article for my extended family isn’t that this message just applies to my parents. Grandma and Grandpa Ulmer, aunts, uncles, cousins, even, and I can’t believe I’m saying this, my younger siblings, you would all make valuable additions to Hutchinson and should absolutely move here.